You wake up One day in mid- May to Early- June to find your grass dead and brown from the heat, your dog panting and miserable, and your own body soaked head to toe due to the lack of air conditioning in the night. Yup, dykes, it's summertime.
Now, despite the generally disgusting, sweaty, heat addled misery of a typical summer below the Mason Dixon Line, there are some pretty awesome things to look forward to: BBQ parties, Margaritas on deck at expensive restaurants...
But, we all know what the best part of summer is for ANY LESBO:
DYKES ON THE BEACH.
Now, while obviously filled with copious amounts of joy at the prospect of spending even a little time ogling hotties on the beach in summer, I am also swept with an enormous wave of panic. You see, 'mos, I don't look like the gorgeous, babelicious dykes in the photo above.
I'm fat. No, really, I am. Nobody wants to see me in a bathing suit, and I sure as hell DO NOT want to be seen in one. You're talking to someone who doesn't even wear shorts in summer, in spite of the almost unbearable heat for several miserable months out of the year here. Seriously. So what's a girl to wear?
Well, Lesbos, here is Shannon's beach uniform for the year:
Yep, you guessed it: Board Shorts.
You can bet your sweet bippy I won't be looking like this
In them though. Oh well. To complete the ensemble, is, of course, every lesbian's summer wardrobe staple, a white wife beater tank.
Hey, it might not be typical female beachwear,dykes,but it isn't unusual for us, and, most importantly, I won't scare everyone off the beach. Happy First Day of summer, Lovely Lessies!