Ya know, lovelies, we sure are having a lot of series posts lately, aren't we? But I think the last few have been wildly appropriate. At any rate, welcome to Episode 8! This is inspired by my now active quest for The Perfect Date.
Well, lesbos, it is no secret to anyone who knows me that Shannon has dated a literal PARADE of women over the years. But,alas, for one reason or another, none of these relationships were meant to be. So, after a little while, I decided to take time off from the dating scene and hit the books.
This served me well, because, other than a casual, on again off again situation of convenience and lots of reckless casual sex, I didn't have a girlfriend. I had time to figure out exactly what I wanted in a woman, and I did. Hence, I now have a totally honest and rad OKCUPID PROFILE.
Now, the profile is linked right there,ladies, for anyone single and on the prowl. *wink*
However, there is something that I have been doing wrong, even after figuring out what I want. I have been assuming that I am headed toward settled-ville, a la a 21st century lesbian version of Lloyd and June Cleaver from the old Leave It To Beaver show.
(closest I could find to a lesbian Lloyd and June so live with it)
While, yes, there are many lesbian couples who want the whole OMFG- house- with- a -white- picket- fence- with a 9-5 job and 2.5 kids and a dog....
I AM NOT ONE OF THEM.
In fact, the very idea makes me recoil in horror. Nope, I do not want a conventional lifestyle of imitation heterosexuality, lesbian style. The very idea makes me go
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
And run for the hills. Nope, not for Shannon, dykes. Wanna know what I do want? Well, whether ya wanna know or not, I am going to tell you. I want, first of all, a gayborhood.
Yep, you heard me right. I'd much prefer a studio in the city surrounded by gay bars, coffee houses full of lesbians and vegan eateries than a house in the 'burbs.
Also, I want a like- minded, stereotypical dyke.
That's right! Someone who doesn't care about heteronormative living, but who will hang out with me in juice bars
Go to gay book stores
Talk Queer Feminist Politics
And just generally enjoy being queer in a queer environment sans all the wannabe straight BS that seems to be so prevalent these days.
I want a sex positive, open to open relationships, out and proud, fight for our rights QUEER WOMAN, not an imitation heterosexual.
So, there you have it, queermos. I finally found the missing piece to the puzzle of why things weren't working out. It was because I was trying to be conventional, when I am anything but. Or rather, I was trying to do heteronormative conventional, as many gays do. Hey, it works for some people, and I applaud anyone living their truth and their happiness. Fine for them. Not fine for me. I am an unconventionally conventional lesbian, and proud of it.
HOORAY FOR SELF DISCOVERY!