Saturday, April 16, 2011

Series: Debunking Dyke Myths

Myth #3: Lesbians Hate Bisexual Women

      Ok 'mos, time for a rather serious post. I was just on AfterEllen, and had a most disturbing conversation that forced me and others to examine the prejudice within  the lesbian community against people who should be treated as one of our own: bisexual women. Now, as has already been mentioned in a previous "myth" post, THIS
is simply not what does it for us. Agree?

However, as we are all well aware, there are lady lovin' ladies for whom this occasionally(or more than occasionally) does rock their worlds. And there is nothing wrong with that. And that brings me to the serious part of this post. There is nothing wrong with being bisexual.
But there are some lesbians who have a problem with bisexual women. And this is a problem. Now, I have personally been left on three occasions due to situations surrounding my partners' attraction to men. Not gonna lie, this means that I am more comfortable dating another lesbian rather than a bisexual woman. I also have a sense of resentment toward 'heterosexual privilege' enjoyed by bisexuals who are in heterosexual relationships, especially those of the variety who decide to pass for straight, or choose men over women for the sole purpose of having an easier life. Queerness is cool, and we should all embrace who we are, no matter where we fall on the LGBTQPIA spectrum.

However, after some of the responses in that thread, I can see why some bisexuals may be wary of the queer community. Are some of the reasons for wariness, on both ends, valid? Sure they are. But discounting all bisexuals because you got burned by one woman who happened to be bi is wrong. It is the same bigotry we face from so many straight people, and we are applying it to our own. So, in debunking this myth, I am a little angry, and a lot alarmed, because, in some ways, for some dykes, it  isn't a myth at all. 

So, homogays, what do you suggest we do about this? We fight so much prejudice from  the outside, we hardly have room for it on the inside. I challenge you all to examine yourselves. Are you so hung up on being gay, that you exhibit gay elitist behavior toward other letters in our acronym? I admit to being at least slightly guilty of it, but I am willing to change. Are you?

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Online Dating: The Best Route to Girl Groovin'?

You would think with the world at our fingertips, that anyone who didn't want to be single wouldn't. 

Alas, I am quite sure that even though we are joined at the hip with our laptops these days, that does not mean that the key to true love has necessarily been found within.

Now listen up, 'mosexuals. When I go without, I get cranky. And a cranky Shannon is no fun for anyone. Lemme, tell ya, I'm being straight up on that one. Now there is always the option of you know, the dreaded One Nighter. 

We've all  been there. We've all done it. But I am 30 years old. About to graduate. Time to quit that shit. Wouldn't you lovely ladies agree?
Thought so.

So now, I am looking for TRUE LOVE. You know, my ONE AND ONLY. But, even with tens of thousands, perhaps more, women on the internet, I have had no luck. I have, however come across some awesome gay sites. AfterEllen is a great pop culture, news, and advice site with a rather active forum, for example. Lesbotronic is a REALLY private site that offers forums, and a separate section for personals. There are also people who say and EHarmony might give good results as well. But I am broke and cheap and hell will freeze over before I pay for that. So, whataya think, queers? Is online dating the way to go to find Everlasting dyke love?

Series: Debkunking Dyke Myths

Myth #2: We Just Haven't Found the Right Man.

Told ya  part of the last myth was a story for another dayWell, wait no more, for that day has arrived!  While most lesbians will happily befriend a straight man, THIS

just isn't what rocks our world. End of story. Get it?

 When you start spewing ignorance about how we just need to experience you and then all will be well, we are likely to never talk to you again. Why, you ask? Are we unable to just give you a chance? The answers to those are simple: it isn't about you. Lesbians don't need "the right man." There is no right man. If there were, we wouldn't be LESBIANS.See where I am going with this? I hope so. I understand that this can ruffle feathers and hurt fragile egos. But hey, sometimes, the truth hurts.

The thing is THIS

is what does it for us. Nothing, not even the most perfect man in the world, will ever change that.You know why, because, while there may be some dudes out there who are damn near close to perfect, NONE of them are perfect for us.